Some humorous thoughts:
You know you're really old when a 1 Star General looks like a kid from your high school year book.
It isn't bad being 68. I just wish I had planned things out past that really old age of 30.
If you think wages in Nam was bad, try living off of Social Security.
We are officially not on borrowed time anymore. We bankrupted that sucker.
You know you've done gone over the hill when people call up asking where to send the flowers.
When the joystick replaces the cyclic, you're cursing aloud as you crash the chopper for the 1,000,000 time, and the game comes up with a flashing congratulations screen announcing "WOW, You've smashed up more chopper that we can count!", you might want to try something less damaging to that male ego.
When a 1,000 piece puzzle takes a day for you to figure out how to unpack it, get the candy out and promise them candy if they finish it for you. Just remember, to keep the last piece for yourself.
That way, you can eat the candy and honestly say you finished the puzzle yourself.
When the grand kids ask you what you did in Vietnam, ask them what they did in their mother's womb. Then, take pictures of their facial expressions.
You know your getting old when your Social Security number is the first on the last list still alive.
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